The Ark

by Arthur Guiterman
                     When Noah, perceiving 'twas time to embark,
                       Persuaded the creatures to enter the Ark,
                       The dog, with a friendliness truly sublime,
                        Assisted in herding them two at a time.
                      He drove in the elephants, zebras and gnus
                    Until they were packed like a box full of screws,
                    The cat in the cupboard, the mouse on the shelf,
                    The bug in the crack; then he backed in himself.
                     Because of which drenching, zoologists hold,
                       The nose of a healthy dog always is cold!
                    But such was the lack of available space
                       He couldn't tuck all of him into the place;
                       So after the waters had flooded the plain
                    And down from the heavens fell blankets of rain
                  He stood with his muzzle thrust out through the door
                      The whole forty days of that terrible pour!

 
 

      THE DOGS DICTIONARY

                  LEASH: A strap which attaches to your collar, enabling you to leadyour
                               person where you want him/her to go.
                 DOG BED: any soft, clean surface, such as the white bedspread in theguest
                        room or the newly upholstered couch in the living room.
                  DROOL: Is what you do when your persons have food and you don't. To
                dothis properly you must sit as close as you can and look sad and letthe drool
                             fall to the floor or better yet, on their laps.
                SNIFF: A social custom to use when you greet other dogs. Place yournose as
                 close as you can to the other dog's rear end and inhaledeeply, repeat several
                             times, or until your person makes you stop.
                  GARBAGE CAN: A container which your neighbors put out once a week
                totest your ingenuity. You must stand on your hind legs and try to pushthe lid
               off with your nose. If you do it right you are rewarded withmargarine wrappers
                       to shred, beef bones to consume and moldy crustsof bread.
                BICYCLES: Two-wheeled exercise machines, invented for dogs to controlbody
                 fat. To get maximum aerobic benefit, you must hide behind a bushand dash
               out, bark loudly and run alongside for a few yards; theperson then swerves and
                             falls into the bushes, and you prance away.
                DEAFNESS: This is a malady which affects dogs when their person wantthem
                in and they want to stay out. Symptoms include staring blankly atthe person,
                         then running in the opposite direction, or lying down.
               THUNDER: This is a signal that the world is coming to an end. Humansremain
                 amazingly calm during thunderstorms, so it is necessary to warnthem of the
                 danger by trembling uncontrollably, panting, rolling youreyes wildly, and
                                     following at their heels.
                WASTEBASKET: This is a dog toy filled with paper, envelopes, and oldcandy
                 wrapper. When you get bored, turn over the basket and strew thepapers all
                            over the house until your person comes home.
                SOFAS: Are to dogs like napkins are to people. After eating it ispolite to run
                     up and down the front of the sofa and wipe your whiskersclean.
                  BATH: This is a process by which the humans drench the floor, wallsand
                     themselves. You can help by shaking vigorously and frequently.
               LOVE: Is a feeling of intense affection, given freely and withoutrestriction. The
               best way you can show your love in return is to wagyour tail. If you're lucky, a
                                  human will love you in return.
                                         Author Unknown

MY BOSTON TERRIER DOGS

                                 I knew a little dog
                                His name was Beau
                               Every time I saw him,
                                  He had to go!
                                I have a female dog
                               Whose name is Misha
                               And when we are apart
                                 I sure do miss ya!
                              Our family owned a dog
                              Whose name was Rocky
                                 She was very cute
                                 And very cocky!
                                We also owned a dog
                              We called Prince 'Rudie,
                              His little neck would arch
                              He appeared quite snooty!
                              Lani was the sweetest dog
                              That one could ever know
                              That's because her daddy
                            Was our old Champion Beau!
                                 Author: RASPUTEN2

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