~by Joan Steik

1. Your new refrigerator will have a lock for the ice dispenser on the door.
2. Newf hair is oven proof, microwave and dishwasher safe!
3. No need for a clock...Newfs know to the second when it's time to wake up and eat!
4. You need a sign for your bathroom door  "Newfs Sleeping" Obstruction to Facilities
5. You wonder how you ever survived without your doggie dryer...it has so many other uses besides drying your Newf!
6. When purchasing your new car you bring a measuring tape to see how many crates will fit.
7. Beware! Newf hair has been known to kill vacuum cleaners.
8. Your Newfs snoring will drown out your spouses....so you can sleep!
9. You hope Martha Stewart starts sleeping with her Chows...so you can purchase a bed larger than a king from K-Mart.
10. The interior of your house "Glimmers" with enamel paint.
11. No need to buy more Christmas tree decorations...you only decorate the top half now.
12. Family & friends learn that -  DROOL IS COOL & SPIT HAPPENS
13. You need night vision goggles to use the rest room at night...so you don't trip over those black Newfs.
14. Your lawn has a new look... it's called polka-dot.
15. The color of MUD becomes your favorite color for redecorating!
16. You think you have gotten use to the slime until it oozes between your toes.
17. Your Newfs hair is like velcro it attracts all sorts of interesting objects!
18. Newfs get extremely silly in the snow!
19. BEWARE......YOU CAN'T OWN JUST ONE!!!

~ by Joan Steik

Noisy Drool - Slobber  mixed with dirt.

Colored Drool - Slobber mixed with food.

Drool Mache - Slobber mixed with paper.

Yuk Tuck! -  What you do to avoid slime contact on your face!

Sinking Drool - The blob you find at the bottom of your coffee cup.

Slippery Slime - The invisible Puddle of Drool on the floor.

JELL-O Drool - What you will find in your dog's water dish.

Drool On Cue - Reduces the number of unwanted guests!

Winter Drool - Gooey slippery slime on your gloves.

Summer Drool - Gooey slime oozing between your toes.

Macho Slime - The marking of drool on your walls and ceiling.

Lap Slime - This happens after your dog gets a drink... sometimes called - Human Drool Towel.

Road Drool - Accumulation of Slobber 'N Slime in your car!